Entering the Dark
On the Christian calendar we are in the season of Advent. Ancient Celtic Christians would have been keenly mindful of this time of year and this practice of looking inward to the longing for life and hope. In a nice harmony, pre-Christian Celts would have seen this season of Samhain as a time of moving into the home, gathering around the warm fires, giving thanks for the harvest provisions, looking inward to investigate both home relationships and the awareness of provisions dwindling and the hope of new life that hasn’t arrived yet.
“Provisions dwindling and the hope of new life that hasn’t arrived yet”. I invite you to gather your awareness around that acknowledgement that resides deep in your being. For the Christian and the non-Christian alike, the inner call is the same. The tone of the soul is the same across all of humanity. We move into a period of letting go, wondering if we have enough emotional, relational, spiritual, and physical provision to last the “winter”. And we acknowledge and ache for more, for provision, for life to be brought to us again. And the awareness that we are dependent on a Source that is beyond ourselves. We look for the source of Life to “save” us once again. It is a yearly and rhythmic return to experience of longing and dependency. And it is a cry to the Mystery to draw us toward the next phase of life, love, thriving, connectedness, and experience.
The ancient Celts, and all indigenous cultures around the world, were skilled at acknowledging these rhythms of the human developmental journey. Actually, I should say that these cultures “are” skilled at this awareness, but in our modern society it has become exceedingly difficult to acknowledge these rhythms, stirrings, aches, and longings of the human heart. But the echo of these rhythms still exists in these kinds of cultures that are attuned to the deep life-giving realities of the human as she/he interacts with Nature and meets the Divine.
I invite you to consider several practices and questions that may provoke you this season to mark the realities of “winter” in your soul as well as the hope for redemptive and life-giving “spring” toward which your heart leans. Perhaps you would want to work with these questions and postures during these next few weeks.
Spend a few moments of silent time each day to acknowledge dark or shadow feelings that arise at this time of year. These feelings might include loneliness, unsureness of your own future, feeling scared, or feelings of whatever forms of darkness presses in upon you. These are not your enemies. These are part of the journey of all of us. Can you just sit with these feelings without fighting them and let them be present?
Put on your layers of warm fibers and venture into the woods or forest or fields to hear the conversation that the Earth is having about death, hibernation, respite, or waiting.
Watch the birds as they have time-tested habits of finding sustenance amidst the hibernation of Life. They are present. They are practiced in the skill of hunting and finding. And they know how to go without at times. Watch their beauty even when they aren’t sure of where their food will be found.
Ask yourself what it is like for you to be contained “inside” the wall of your home whatever that home may be. Are you with others who are safe for you or do you have questions about those relationships and protections that you need to practice within those relationships. Those are an important part of the awareness of living a dignified and authentic life.
Sit by a source of heat (fire, radiator, vent, or even just the shelter of tent or walls or trees) that offer you some memory of the protection of Life. Become aware of that provision even if it is uncomfortable.
If you are able in your circumstance, use this time to begin relaxing into the contained spaces and times that allow for more reading, writing, game playing, or just sitting quietly. In doing so, realize that this moment is a quieter and more inner experience of life. It is a time that holds you well and skillfully.
This can also be a time that negative experiences arise. Perhaps there are painful memories of the year, or confessions that need to be made, addictions that need to be named and faced, of stories of harm of failure that need to be confessed and addressed. This is the season to acknowledge dark awareness and know that is a vital part of the journey as well.
If you can see barren trees or plants from your space then see that the shapes, colors, and animal life within those barren spaces is still Life in this moment. Life never ceases even when it is diminished or hidden. Look! Never stop looking. Sketch that image of life or write about it or at least ponder it deliberately. The hope of life is always upon us.
From these experiences of awareness of the absence and the hope, realize that you have entered into the Advent hope of God coming near to bring life from death once again. You are not forgotten. You will never be forgotten. The Earth announces this hope directly in the middle of winter and then leans us toward Spring. Take time to be in this moment of absence because it makes the awareness of Presence come into focus.
Kirk Webb
(Director and Founder of the Celtic Center)
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